Scroll down for information on this, my newest book! Now available in Spanish and English at

“Thinking back…I realize that your work (Boundaries, Being in My Body and Self Abuse & The Inner Drama Triangle)… work subtly on me and contribute to steps forward small and large.” 

– Stephanie Brooks, Nonviolent Communication Educator

Being In My Body: What You Might Not Have Known About Trauma, Dissociation & The Brain

In Being In My Body, Toni explores developmental trauma, which occurs when we perceive our adult caretakers as unavailable, as scared or scary instead of calm, present, and available in our very early years.  These early interactions result in wiring that determines what we do with emotions and how our bodies respond to other people.  She shows readers how our bodies are the sacred keepers of our truth and our past trauma.

Drawing on the fields of attachment, neuropsychology, and child development, Toni walks readers through how the body holds the key to unlocking what happened to us.  Once we start to make these connections, she explains what we can do to honor our bodies and allow them to become our most powerful allies.  Toni offers specific tools and strategies to effectively rewire our brains so that we can have the lives we have always yearned for.

“Every sentence of this book has resonated with me, in such unexpected ways. And, intimacy being what it is when I’m scared, I couldn’t know other people felt these ways until you dared to write it down. Thank you, Toni.”   

Ellie Marie Moore, PhD; LCSW, Columbia, MO

Being In My Body offers a way for us to integrate with our bodies, not just to discover historic trauma, but also to obtain daily awareness of what is going on in our lives.” 

– Stephanie Brooks, NVC Trainer, Columbia, MO

“As I read Being In My Body, I felt like I was being accompanied through difficult terrain by a gentle guide who was willing to share her own journey in the hopes that it would help others along on theirs. In my case, it certainly has…” 

– Megan Farmer, Postgraduate Psychology Student, Calif.

“Your explanation of the different types of trauma and how it manifests is masterful!!!  There’s nothing ‘swimmy’ about this work — congratulations!”

                 – Janae B. Weinhold, PhD LPC, Colorado Springs, CO

Buy book in English here.

Buy book in Spanish here.

Body Owner’s Guide for the Stewards of the New Earth: My Meta Self Owner’s Guide

How tragic that so many people feel, deep down, that they are on their own!  Early relational trauma leaves people feeling that they are different, alone, and lacking in essential resources and belonging.  They have yet to find their own tribe or connect with their roots.  As they move through life, these feelings can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.  Within this volume you will find eight chapters by eight loving ethereal masters, offering nuggets of wisdom in a format that can be read from start to finish or opened at random to spark your creative juices and inspire you to reach for more of what your soul is longing for.  This handy reference book includes affirmations, dream interpretations and more, with the intention of bringing into focus a vision of a post-trauma future. 

Though this manual has been created for the author, it is also intended to inspire you to strengthen your connections with your own angels, guides and ancestors.  They are always there, and there is nothing they would like more than to see you learn how to care for yourself well.  May this set you on the path of creating your own personal volume.

Available in English here.

Encuentre su copia en Amazon buscando el título del libro: Guía de Autocuidado para los Guardianes de la Nueva Tierra.  Gracias!!

Estar en mi cuerpo: la relación del trauma, la disociación y el cerebro
Cuando pensamos en nuestro pasado, muchos de nosotros nos decimos que aquello que vivimos en nuestro entorno no fue tan traumático, o tan malo como para que debamos atenderlo en terapia o prestarle un poco más de atención.
Estar en mi cuerpo aborda la disociación, nuestra habilidad para apartar la consciencia de nuestro cuerpo y así evitar experimentar el dolor que sufrimos ante experiencias de abandono, tristeza, coraje, vergüenza, humillación, entre otras emociones vulnerables, traumáticas.
Esta habilidad que nos ha evitado el dolor, también se ha puesto en medio de nuestra capacidad para involucrarnos en relaciones profundas. La disociación como consecuencia del trauma, sobre todo cuando éste sucede en las etapas anteriores al habla, cuando llorar para pedir ayuda no fue suficiente se vuelve un mecanismo para relacionarnos con el mundo.
Estar en mi cuerpo explica cómo funcionan el trauma y la disociación, cómo
afectan el funcionamiento del cerebro, no sólo desde la perspectiva científica, sino que aterriza la teoría a ejemplos de cómo el trauma y la disociación han afectado la personalidad y la toma de decisiones de otras personas.
Con un texto que indaga de forma científica en un léxico amigable, Toni se expone a sí misma y nos acompaña en el proceso de revisar nuestras historias, ofreciéndonos herramientas para comenzar nuestro propio proceso, y acompañar a aquellos que necesiten de nuestra comprensión y empatía. Toni hace del libro un trayecto de sanación.
Compre en Guadalajara MX desde La Nube en Americana frente al Mercado Juarez o aquí
Also available on Amazon.
Self Abuse & The Inner Drama Triangle: Transforming the IDT & Learning to Parent Yourself Well

This 200-page paperback is a print version of an online course created by Toni Rahman to help childhood trauma survivors learn ways of identifying and eliminating the defenses they developed as children to cope with the shock and stress of not having their emotional needs adequately met.

This course in a workbook will be your guide as you learn to recognize and eliminate internal/self-abuse and become a better, more loving parent to yourself.  It offers a practical, effective, research-supported framework including exercises to reduce the intensity and duration of emotional flashbacks, a symptom of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) and unresolved early stress and trauma.

This course is designed to equip you with tools to use when you:

  • Often find yourself stuck in internal conflicts about what you want and where you are going.
  • Are sometimes so harsh and unrelenting with yourself that you cannot relax and enjoy what you have.
  • Find yourself getting triggered often or staying triggered for long periods of time.

Tap into your deepest potential by learning to focus your attention.  Dare to invest the time and commitment that is necessary to replace old, worn-out strategies to avoid feeling vulnerable and replace them with authenticity, integration and health.  Reconnect with your body’s social engagement system by safely directing your compassionate attention inward.

Get ready.  You are about to learn how to calm your nervous system and experience what it feels like to be held in the safety and stability of the parents you never had.

Check out the online course here.   Purchase the book here and receive a discount on the course.

“Very helpful and informative course that really puts a name to the monster we deal with. Toni is compassionate, kind, and understanding as well.”                                  – Jenny Bennett,  St. Louis MO

“Toni is magical. Her ability to draw the real picture of what is going on into manageable concepts is unmatched. She is able to weave connection in an area that otherwise feels isolating and painfully unique. Toni’s approach is compassionate, calm and freeing.”       – Julie Peterson, Norborne, MO

“Taking this course has helped me reframe my past, but more importantly for me now, helps move me forward to challenge limitations and rethink how I live my life. Thanks for the nudges to recreate my life into something more invigorating.”                                            – Stephanie Brooks, Columbia, MO

Look for this book on Amazon.

Boundaries 101: Learning to Recognize, Honor & Communicate Your Personal Limits

This booklet stands alone as a primer in boundaries and serves as a study guide for a course by the same name.  The course offers a 5-week introduction on the subject and explains what boundaries are and why they may not be something we feel mastery around.  It offers a simple roadmap for developing boundaries. This study guide includes a collection of readings geared to prepare individuals for further study on the subject.  The course offers basic information and hands-on training to people who may have had trouble setting boundaries and recognizing boundary violations in the past, or for people who would just like to strengthen their sense of Self.

Buy book here.  Contact Toni if you would like to host a group of 8 or more people for a Boundaries 101 Class in your town.

Tahòle: The Politics of Love

Tahòle describes an American woman’s rite of passage while living with an extended family in Bangladesh for five years. It follows the protagonist’s struggles to adapt to the deeply entrenched patterns of codependency in the culture; she ultimately stumbles onto principles that liberate her from the oppression of her own codependency and allow her to create the life she wants for herself.

Buy book here.